Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Randomize
