Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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