ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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