Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
