I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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