Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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