I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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