I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
