Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Girls should come with a carfax report
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
