Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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