More tranny stories later!
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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