This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
