carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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