I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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