the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
