he looks like a really good dad on facebook
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Randomize
