bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
