she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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