My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
thus making me awesome and them whores
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
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