he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
