The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize