god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize