Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Randomize
