Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
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