Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
