its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
