I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
