ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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