To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize