What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Randomize
