is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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