I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
