It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
