these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Randomize
