Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
