is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Randomize
