I cannot find my penis.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
