All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
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