i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
