Whod you bang
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
