so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
