Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize