is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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