He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
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