Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize