he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
