i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
