Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
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