We got so high we made milksteak
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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