my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
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