There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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