it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
